276

I am 1 pound away from a 20-pound loss. Too bad I am going to get Chinese tonight! It is a small price to pay though.

Okay, I promised more details about my lifestyle. I know you were dying waiting!

Sam and I broke up and I moved back to Indiana. We are working on things but it certainly doesn't help my emotional eating issue. I really wish I could confront the school and the guidance counselor that approved chocolate candy after each session. I've managed to only eat out once a week and hardly eat sweets anymore. Now that girl scout cookie season is over anyway,

But I took a job as a live-in nanny and it is awesome. I don't have to pack a lunch. All of my fresh produce is here for me to eat and I can cook it at lunch time because the stove is right here too! I gave up the serving although my wallet is pissed at me for it. I work 3-5 days a week at a maternity store to supplement my income. I like it but I am still looking for some kind of server position. I don't need to explain how hard it is to find a job these days.

I have a friend, Sarah, who is vegan and she has really opened my eyes to what I should and should not be eating. I can't give up meat (fish mainly) but I don't eat it nearly as often. I could actually go a whole day without any meat products and not even on purpose. But the main point of bringing Sarah up is she makes these "healthy" cupcakes. They are vegan, gluten-nut-dairy free. And taste freaking amazing. I'll post the recipe next blog.

I have given up on olive oil and I am going to give coconut oil a try. I'm sure there will be a new oil that comes out next month that is better than coconut oil but until then...

I drink mostly water through out the day. I have one 8oz serving of green tea which is ZERO calories. Well, the honey that I put in it isn't but its better than sugar. I buy local honey, too. Otherwise what is the point?

I do at least one physical activity a day even if it is a small one. Cory and I have different schedules and so meeting up at the gym together doesn't always work out and with the weather finally getting nice it is hard to be cooped up inside with a bunch of other sweaty people.

So some examples: 30 mins of Just Dance on my Wii, 1 mile walk with the boys that I nanny for, I have these little wrist weights that I do some arm exercises with, walk 2.5-4 miles with Cory at the river, and last but not least: the gym. I can actually do 30+ mins on the elliptical. That is a major triumph or this fatty.

Some days the workouts are small but that's okay. We all need a break every now and then.

278

Wow. It certainly has been a very long time since I have posted in here. Sorry about that. I had totally given up...again...and I certainly didn't want to admit it.

But here I am to tell you the in-between stuff.

I tried over the time I was away to stay on track with eating but I only ate healthy 50% of the time and I hardly worked out because I was back to working two jobs again.

Then I moved back to Indiana with my take-no-prisoners BFF Cory. She hits the gym and she hits it hard. But its different this time. She is a big girl like me too so its like we are doing it together. Last time I had my friend Beth or no one working out with me. Beth was a twig so the working out part of our relationship wasn't the best part.

Food is better now. 95% of my meals are healthy and I actually don't eat a lot of meat anymore and I am almost gluten-free. That damn bread gets me everytime.

The pooping issue is no longer in place.

Oh, I started full force into this healthy life style back in Jan. I know, I know! But over four months later and I am still doing it so maybe I wasn't another resolutioner. I started at...295...eek. But now I am down 17 lbs and counting.

Also, one new thing I have added is Calorad. Its a weightloss supplement that you take at night. So far so good. I've only been taking it for a week and it knocked out 5 pounds. But don't they always start off great like that? http://caloradspecials.com/orderonline.php?gclid=CM_J-7Tw-LYCFdJQOgodREQAgg I won two free months on their facebook page. I try not to pay for supplements because there are so many scams out there. Make sure you research what you are putting in your body.

Also, I am starting a fat flush tomorrow that has grapefruit, cucumbers, lemons, and mint leaves in water over night. I figured the worst that could happen is I will have minty fruit juice. I'll let you know how it goes.

I won't stay gone that long this time. And I will be back with more details of work-outs and what I've been eating.

I Have NO Idea

Hola Followers!

Guess who fell off the bandwagon?

ME!

I've got a million of excuses though. It all started when I quit working at the daycare. I all of a sudden had a ton more time on my hands only working 25-30 hours a week. And, I felt like I could always workout tomorrow. But tomorrow never came. Then I moved in with my girlfriend. I've not had a "good" move for awhile and it made me a wreck. Emotional=Emotional Eating. And now that I have to actually pay rent that leaves less money for me to spend on food.

Then I started eating fast food once a week and then it was twice a week and then I was eating frozen pizzas and ice cream. Daily.

I'm not fully back but I felt like I can't give up. I've given up on so many things: relationships, school, various jobs, the dishes. I need to follow through with something and this has been on my mind everyday.

There is no evidence left of the 20 pounds I had lost; or I should say that the evidence is definitely there, under my chin, loud and clear.

I still do not drink that much soda, maybe 3 a week but my food habits and exercise habits or sub par. My cardio is the walking I do at work (which isn't much...we've been dead lately) and my diet is ramen noodles and hamburger helper.

I'm disgusted with myself but I can't stop. I try to buy rice but it sits in my cabinet because I'd rather eat processed white noodles with powdered cheese on them. It just doesn't even sound appetizing. But I scarf down a whole box about twice a week.

I guess, I need some motivation.

-Tristin

272

I've finally hit my 20 pound mark. The weight isn't falling off as fast as it was at first and that is understandable. My body is adjusted and now I need to kick it in to second gear. I quit my full time job. It wasn't worth all the time it took up and it definitely wasn't worth putting up with the women that I worked with. (Not all of them, especially not Darla :))

But, now I will have more time and hopefully more energy to work out and more motivation to get my butt back in school and finish my degree for Creative Writing. I really would like to get back into writing (fiction and poetry) and not just a blog every week or so.

Well, what do I do now? I've been eating the same things and doing the same workout and I feel like I have nothing else to tell you about it. You know it all.

I will tell you a funny story though. I was leaving a bar and I was waiting for two of my friends inside. A lady hit my car with her car door and when I got out to look at it she antagonized me about looking at my door. She called me a dumb white bitch and told me to stop flipping out when I actually didn't say a single word to her. I let it all go until she told me to get my fat ass back in my car and that's when it was on. But, of course she pulled away as she was screaming this out her car door.

I am fat, but I'm working on it, I just wish people could come up with a better insult. Like I haven't heard I was fat since I was born. My own grandmother told me I was just so pretty but if I lost weight then I could get a boyfriend. Psshh.

Oh, and I had a cousin tell me that I'd never get a serving job being overweight. I already had worked at a restaurant for two years as a server and I work as a server now. And no, not at a rundown mom and pop place either.

There mother fuckers. FUCK YOU.

(My grandmother is not a mother fucker)

That's all.

-Tristin

PS. If you go out to eat look online before you go at their nutritional facts. It will make you think twice about what you order and where you go. Scary.

275

It has been awhile since I've posted and I've only lost three more pounds. To be honest, I lost my motivation, and while I didn't go completely off the edge, I didn't do my best. I worked out one day at most last week and had a cheeseburger and tator tots from Sonic. Ugh, my body didn't respond well.

Now that I am back to 4 days a week at my second job instead of the every other weekend schedule I was on makes it a lot harder to find time and energy to hit the gym. I did buy myself a new pair of Nike's and some Lil Wayne and Britney to work out to.

I had a doctors appt a week ago unrelated to weight issues and told her about the bathroom issues. I have another appt in 3 weeks to see if it is still an issue. My internet is down at home and so I came to McDonald's to bum off their free wi-fi and couldn't even sit for 20 minutes to type this up before I had to hit the bathroom. So, I'm sitting in McDonald's bathroom typing this because I'm too embarrassed to go back out there. It is definitely an issue.

So, I'm back in the saddle and I packed myself a salad for lunch today. I'll try to get back here more often :\

-Tristin

278

I cannot even explain how happy I am right now. I had a 20 pound loss goal by June 13th. I only have 6 more pounds to go. I can do it!

I'm just too excited to sit here and blog. I'm going for a walk before I have to go to work. Now, do I want to wear a bra?

-Tristin

284

I heard a rumor that the best time to weigh yourself is in the morning. And that water weight can effect the pounds on the scale. So I didn't screw myself over as bad as I thought. I was holding a little extra weight because of all the saaalllltttt. UGH. But now I'm back on track with a better spirit!

This week has been rough, not food wise but exercise wise, because of PMS. The last time I worked out was Tuesday morning for 39 minutes at DMH. Then I started my period on Tuesday and it was all downhill from there. I've managed to not eat myself silly and not indulge in chocolate or cheesecake or both. I settled for Skinny Cow Ice Cream Sandwiches: 150 calories. Saweeeeeet.

I am two sizes down from 26 to 22. When I get to 18 I'm going to have a party!!

But there is light at the end of the tunnel and don't weigh yourself at night.

-Tristin

PS. 10 pieces of broccoli is not better then 1 french fry. Portionssss...always watch your portions.